If you have spent any time in Christian circles, you probably have been asked the question, “Where are you at with God?” or some version of it multiple times. I’ve even asked it myself to others plenty of times over the years.
I have a hard time with that question based on how it’s usually answered. I have historically had a tendency to judge or grade myself based on how I feel I have measured up (or how many quiet times I’ve had or how “good” I feel I had been the past day, week, or month). There is nothing inherently wrong with the question, but I think I have a misaligned view of the Creator of the Universe if I think that my standing with him is determined by my behavior.
Perhaps a better phrasing of that question would be, “How aware are you of God’s loving presence today?” It is immense, more than we could ever comprehend. It’s rooted in a false view of who God is, and ultimately who I am. If we believe Romans 8 that “nothing can separate us from the love of God,” then even though we may FEEL distant, he is ALWAYS near and with us. Yet somehow the enemy keeps us rooted in our false self, the one that is always trying to earn grace and constantly striving to do or be better because of our fear, doubt and insecurity.
I have been spending some time the past few weeks in Psalm 139. It’s a common Psalm, one we’ve all undoubtedly heard quoted many times. David was a man “after God’s own heart” and had an understanding of how abundant God’s love was for him (despite his imperfections). He seemed to be keenly aware of how profoundly God knew him and exactly where he stood with God: that God was deeply in love with his entire being. I challenge anyone to read Psalm 139 below and then answer the same question, “Where are you at with God?” Hopefully, we are reminded how God knows us, cares for us, is always with us, and is absolutely crazy in love with each and every one of us.
Psalm 139 (The Passion Translation)
1Lord, you know everything there is to know about me.
2 You perceive every movement of my heart and soul,
and you understand my every thought before it even enters my mind.
3–4 You are so intimately aware of me, Lord.
You read my heart like an open book
and you know all the words I’m about to speak
before I even start a sentence!
You know every step I will take before my journey even begins.
5 You’ve gone into my future to prepare the way,
and in kindness you follow behind me
to spare me from the harm of my past.
You have laid your hand on me!
6 This is just too wonderful, deep, and incomprehensible!
Your understanding of me brings me wonder and strength.
7 Where could I go from your Spirit?
Where could I run and hide from your face?
8 If I go up to heaven, you’re there!
If I go down to the realm of the dead, you’re there too!
9 If I fly with wings into the shining dawn, you’re there!
If I fly into the radiant sunset,[c] you’re there waiting!
10 Wherever I go, your hand will guide me;
your strength will empower me.
11 It’s impossible to disappear from you
or to ask the darkness to hide me,
for your presence is everywhere, bringing light into my night.
12 There is no such thing as darkness with you.
The night, to you, is as bright as the day;
there’s no difference between the two.
13 You formed my innermost being, shaping my delicate inside
and my intricate outside,
and wove them all together in my mother’s womb.
14 I thank you, God, for making me so mysteriously complex!
Everything you do is marvelously breathtaking.
It simply amazes me to think about it!
How thoroughly you know me, Lord!
15 You even formed every bone in my body
when you created me in the secret place;
carefully, skillfully you shaped me[f] from nothing to something.
16 You saw who you created me to be before I became me!
Before I’d ever seen the light of day,
the number of days you planned for me
were already recorded in your book.
17–18 Every single moment you are thinking of me!
How precious and wonderful to consider
that you cherish me constantly in your every thought!
O God, your desires toward me are more
than the grains of sand on every shore!
When I awake each morning, you’re still with me.
19 O God, come and slay these bloodthirsty, murderous men!
For I cry out, “Depart from me, you wicked ones!”
20 See how they blaspheme your sacred name
and lift up themselves against you, but all in vain!
21 Lord, can’t you see how I despise those who despise you?
For I grieve when I see them rise up against you.
22 I have nothing but complete hatred and disgust for them.
Your enemies shall be my enemies!
23 God, I invite your searching gaze into my heart.
Examine me through and through;
find out everything that may be hidden within me.
Put me to the test and sift through all my anxious cares.
24 See if there is any path of pain I’m walking on,
and lead me back to your glorious, everlasting way—
the path that brings me back to you.
Matt T.